Election Prediction: Zombie Leaders to Sweep the Polls

With two uninspiring leaders most of the excitement in this election has come from the former leaders. Obviously the campaign launches featured ‘passing the torch moments’ - the memorable Howard hug at the Coalition launch and Abbott’s glowing reference to a “former prime minister who’s a hero”. Malcolm Fraser, however, was absent.

But what about Bob Hawke who not only performed as an opening act for Julia Gillard at the campaign launch, but there was also the Hawke TV movie in which he discusses Labor’s wage reform in the midst of bedroom scenes with Blanch d'Alpuget. He was also reclaiming his title of the Silver Budgie from the Budgie Smuggler.

Who could miss Mark Latham - making himself a target for comedians everywhere by reporting for 60 minutes. The Chaser’s Yes We Canberra devoted a Mark Latham hand cam to the ex-Labor leader just to see who’s hand he’d try to strongarm next, but Latham was writing his own gags when he recommended that Australians go for the donkey vote tomorrow and not fill out their ballot.

But the former leader that’s been most impressive is Liberal legend John Hewson, who has been a guest on ABC’s Gruen Nation. He’s cheerfully discussed when he caught an egg at an open-air protest and his bumbling attempt to explain how the GST will affect a birthday cake. But on the final pre-election show, Hewson responded to the Australian Sex Party’s Jerk Choices ad saying that they were the only politicians to admit they were “wankers”. And in a mock poll at the program’s close, host Wil Anderson reckons Hewson would have a huge majority if he ran for PM and would be forming a government on Monday.