Steve Martin leaks his own rider

Comedian, novelist, playwright and all-round wild and crazy guy, Steve Martin has prefaced his upcoming tour by leaking his rider onto his own website. Who says Americans don’t do irony?

Among Martin’s many claims of venues who host him are “waterproof guyliner” and the request that every ten minutes before the show a new trophy will be delivered to Steve. While the trophies could say “Best Show of the Year” and “Most Beloved”, the document warns “Creativity encouraged (Steve starting to get bored with these.”

Security is paramount to Martin so he asks that his instruments be guarded by “a hostile biggish-looking guard who tells repellently boring stories.” Martin also asks for sweeps with security dogs twice before the show with the second being only “to ensure Steve has dogs to pet if Steve’s dog, Wally, is busy.”